You know you’re pregnant when…Part 2, Trimester 2

  1. Nausea is gone and you can’t even remember what it felt like to feel like you’re going to barf but not actually barfing every second of the day for weeks
  2. You forget you’re even pregnant until you feel tiny hands or feet tap away
  3. Naptime has reduced from a couple of hours a day to 20-30 minutes (planned ones anyways)
  4. You get heartburn just looking at food
  5. Bras become an everyday necessity because your boobs are so much bigger and heavier
  6. Are you imagining it or did your arse get half a size bigger?
  7. You have a lot of energy at the start of the day but if you blink for too long after dinner you’re having a super early night
  8. All of the bread cravings you had in the first trimester are pretty much gone except now it’s all food cravings with a couple of very specific ones. Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes
  9. You need to drink 2 litres of water per day but even water bloats you so you go from 0 – 9 months in appearance in the space of 12 hours
  10. Was that gas, or the baby moving?
  11. Speaking of gas, you don’t have as much as you did in the first trimester, but you still have more than you did before you got pregnant
  12. Yoga feels better than it ever has before because of the back pain you didn’t realise you had until you yoga’d it away
  13. You suddenly need to know if there are sex offenders living close to your home and can’t stop thinking about where and who they are
  14. Paying for anything that isn’t baby or food related no longer interests you
  15. After months of discomfort, you can finally poop everyday again
  16. Peppermint tea becomes delicious
  17. Tight clothing is not your friend
  18. Elasticated waistbands are your best friend
  19. Your regular jeans are too small but your maternity ones are too big so you have a choice of either splurging with your button undone or pulling them up all day
  20. You know you shouldn’t, but you watch a childbirth video at least once per fortnight and spend the next 14 days praying to whatever you believe in that your child’s head is smaller than the one you just saw coming out of that lady’s huha
  21. People ask you how far along you are and you’re not sure if you should be honest and tell them or pull their leg and say “I must have gained a little weight lately because people keep asking me this”
  22. The perfect sleeping position is usually on your left side thanks to circulation, baby weight and things pressing on other things during the night, so once you find it you really don’t want to lose it
  23. As your baby grows, there’s less room to store all the food you’re eating so you poop more which means carefully planning all eating and out of the house trips
  24. You finally understand why pregnant women have their hands on their belly all the time after you catch yourself doing it 10 times a day
  25. Car karaoke time is drastically reduced because driving time is the only time you can talk to your baby out of earshot of people thinking you have lost your mind
  26. Just like pre-pregnancy, you wake up with a smaller stomach only now it explodes out way more after eating anything, so you have to wear something that will stretch 2 sizes over the course of the day
  27. Your nips look and feel more wierd than you even imagined they could
  28. You live with the fan on
  29. Pregnancy brain is real. There’s nothing like a mad search inside the whole of your car for the keys that are still in the lock of the door
  30. The fridge is an amazing place to check for snacks and cool your face down in the summer
  31. You can’t squeeze through that gap, so don’t even try

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